He said, She said

He says… Huggies
I say… Pampers

He says… Chocolates

I says… Vegetables 
Will we ever agree?
I don’t think my husband and I ever thought we would be parents. When we did find out, it was a shock and we did not want to make a big deal of it, and tried to not get too excited. We hardly spoke about our impending baby, as to not try to tempt fate – only at 6 months did we start to have more intense conversations about how we would be parents. 
It was only about the 34 week mark that we started to debate what we would name our child. He liked traditional and I preferred more quirky and left of center. Thank goodness we finally both had a name on the list that was the same. Then it was how do we spell it? Skylar or Skyler, I preferred the “er” – but decided it was not a battle I wished to fight, just incase we had to start at square one again on names. 
Let fast forward a couple months and a year and now we have a 15 month old. A toddler who is testing boundaries and learning her socially acceptable behavior. This past weekend Skylar did something that my husband did not agree to, and he sternly too her no, and did not get over it quickly. I told him he was being silly and she did not know what he was doing – then my husband said something that really stopped me in my tracks! “She is my child too and I can also make decisions on how she is brought up.”
Wow – did this really make me think! In our first 12 months of parents I made a lot of the decisions regarding Skylar, with my husband working away for weeks at a time, I just had to. From her daily routine, products she used, when she would eat solids, stop breastfeeding and so on. I took for granted that there was someone else just as invested in this little life.
We have never sat down and spoken about how we would really raise our daughter – and agree on this. I believe you need to be united as parents, especially in front of your children. 
So I am making a point to have those conversations and try not be an overpowering parent – who thinks I know everything.
Did you talk to your partner and agree on how you would raise your children? 

4 thoughts on “He said, She said

  1. I don’t think raising a child can be a conversation you have pre-baby. You can obviously talk about your ideals and goals but I think in certain situations you (and your partner) just try and be the best you can be. I am terribly empathetic (to a point where I am sometimes naive) but I am also very rational. I will let a situation unfold and play it as it happens and try and be rational while also being sensitive to the situation. My husband on the other hand, is black and white. There needs to be a formula, and if things don’t go according to that he gets agitated. (I’m sorry if it all sounds confusing, it’s hard to explain without examples) There’s certain things you can decide in advance, like religion, home language etc, but most things I think just unfold. (Or we are just winging it 😜) But it’s hard, you want something and your partner wants something, it’s not the same, but at the end of the day it’s what’s in your child’s best interest. ❤️

    Liked by 1 person

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