Moms, you need to let me know if I am over reacting, or being overly “emotional” or what, what… you know… are you feeling my feels?
But I am just getting so irritated with the fact that being pregnant has become an open invitation for comments on my body….
I know not all intentions are said will ill intent, but I just can’t help giving a sharp retort back or hold back the rolling of the eyes, or grimace.
I just can’t take another statement like “wow, you are getting so big”, “you must be about to pop now”, “are you sure there is only one”. Some of the best…. “ah shame you are looking a bit puffy are you retaining a lot of water?”, “Gee you can really tell you are pregnant now” and it goes on…. “Should you be eating all that?”
Then there are the “randoms”, people that never speak to you in the office, all of sudden want to know your whole life story of your pregnancy while you are washing your hands in the bathroom, or walking down the stairs, needing to get to a meeting. Sometimes I think being pregnant is the ultimate ice-breaker for a conversation opener. Because obviously when one is pregnant your body is open for discussion.
Maybe this is why I am so snippy at the moment?
Could this be my own sensitivity to how I feel in my body this time around? My first pregnancy, I was a lot slimmer than I was now with the 2nd. I felt confident, and could wear anything, I got lots of compliments about how great I was looking etc, the “yummy mummy”… This time, I feel like a giant lump, I really do, I take all the compliments with a pinch of salt, and think “they are just being nice”. Because I really feel like the dancing ballerina Hippo’s from Fantasia.
It is so hard to not be overly critical of your body, especially when the changes happening to it are so obvious, to you and the world around you. Being kind to yourself, and saying the mantra “this amazing body is growing a human” – can help, but really it is being self-aware and knowing that you are the only one that can influence how you feel about yourself. Don’t be too harsh on yourself, this is life, things happen, and if you are not your “body perfect” right now, there is no need to stop living, and experiencing life and locking yourself up at home.
Body shaming can work both ways, from the outside in and from the inside out. You can’t stop what people say, but you can stop the way you process the information (easy for me to type right, not so easy to action).
If you are feeling like a whale growing a human or a rhino prancing around the office, or penguin waddling around the house – just know you are not alone, just don’t linger on the negative. Focus on the positive of enjoying the pregnancy, the movement of baby inside, the closeness you feel to your child, even though you have not met them yet, and soon baby will be here, and you will forget about all the comments, pokes at your belly and self-loathing. Because you are a MOTHER, and your body, flab, droopy boobs, dimpled thighs, scars and stretch marks and changed stomach are all part of life and all worth it when you look at your child, and say to yourself “I made that”
Love yourself MOM, because “Your Child will follow your example, not your advice”.